Getting into something that centered around both would probably be a sort of miracle. I’m not into the concept of zombies or voxel building. But even without the lightning stuff, I wouldn’t have been able to get into this. Thus, I was limited to smaller, shorter sessions. There’s a lightning effect that seems to go off fairly regularly in the background. The truth is, whereas I could avoid having a seizure by not firing the build gun in FortressCraft, there was no way to avoid my personal epilepsy trigger in CastleMinerZ. Probably something that would taste like a blander version of Cap’n Crunch, only with stale marshmallows. I mean, hey, zombies! Who doesn’t love zombies? I’m fucking shocked that General Mills hasn’t added a zombie to their Monster Cereal lineup. It leaves me like a flock of sheep without a border collie: utterly useless.ĬastleMinerZ has more of a point. This is a Lego set without my instructions.
If you like to build voxel-style and want a clean slate to do it with, FortressCraft might be for you. I don’t think it would have mattered either way. So I was stuck using the slow-as-constipated-shit pick-axe. Unfortunately, the little ray-gun building thing that allows for faster construction is also what nearly triggered my epilepsy. I also had issues with the speed of building. Give me the world to mess around with and I couldn’t come up with anything to do. But the monument never quite came out looking the way I envisioned. The little angry yellow-faced monster thing in my logo. I tried to set a project for myself: a giant version of my Sweetie character. If you’re the creative type, hell, it’s probably exactly what you’re after. I’m just as bad at playing sandbox games. I just don’t have the imagination to take a set designed for, say, Indiana Jones, and create my own Starship Enterprise from it. When I was a kid, I would get a set of Legos, whip out the instructions, follow them to the T, and once completed, never touch that set again. You know how there are people who will get a set of Legos and come up with the craziest contraptions on their own? Yea, I’m not one of those people. I mean, I couldn’t get as deep as I wanted in either of them due to my epilepsy, but I think I played enough to get the gist of it.
Well, while I certainly won’t argue that they’re badly made games (they’re not), I now have the verification I need that this genre isn’t for me. I’m not sure why they want to know what I think, especially if they already like them. Requests that come from people who already own and are fans of these games. Then again, I wasn’t expecting hundreds of requests for these reviews. I decided temperance was the best solution.
I figured I would either not get into them, or I would get too into them.
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